past

Say It

/ Bri Rawlings / 1 Comment

You can only say I love you in so many ways

You can only say I’m sorry for so many days

Before the pain sets in and the clouds fill with tears

At the realization of my worst fears

So I need you to say it, and say it over again

That I’m not the one you want as your friend

Your defender from all

Your sun shining bright

Not the one you want to kiss goodnight

You can only say I love you in so many ways

You can’t stand to say I’m sorry another day

So leave if you have to, I’m all too good at goodbyes

Leave now without another lie

Say it again and I’ll believe it’s true

Say it again so I’ll stop loving you

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Pause, a ᴿᴱᶠᴸᴱᶜᵀᴵᴼᴺ

/ Bri Rawlings / Leave a comment

I had to fall apart to see all the pieces

Laid out in front of me like a road map to recovery I could pinpoint exactly where the rip in my seem was. I had been stuffing myself full of nothings. Full of air, no weight inside threatening to collapse from lack of structure. Who taught you how to love? I had been stumbling along crafting hopes and dreams but what was 𝓵𝓸𝓿𝓮….

Just a reminder 

/ Bri Rawlings / Leave a comment

She was lost and she knew it. 

Looking for a corner to engulf her hurting soul, someone to finally make her feel whole. A piece to fix a broken half, but scattered shards can’t fix damaged glass.

She was defeated….but pushed through it.

Do not be meek, hold your head high, be bold be proud, it’s ok to cry. You’re not crazy or insane for expressing your views. You have every right to demand how they treat you. Mistakes do not define you, let the past be where it is. I pen this as a reminder to myself….you got this kid.

Wicked Thoughts

/ Bri Rawlings / Leave a comment

Smoking was my nastiest habit

that’s how I think of you

A blemish on my perfectly imperfect life

You live to make mistakes

promises made to be broken, lies told when words spoken

I don’t dislike what transpired

I was drawn to it

dragged to it like the nicotine from the filter of my newports

that rushing high felt when your drug of false love hit my veins

left me feeling filthy like the ash tray of a mouth I had

the blanket of a toddler being pulled across the floor

mindlessly cause you cling to it but chase every bright object that crosses your eye

you wouldn’t let me go

No matter how hard I tried to kick the habit

I was always brought back

even now the thought of a puff makes me lick my lips in wonder

what if